Meg chats | Outgrowing people


Hey lovelies,

Quite a lot has changed in my life recently and I wanted to write a blog post to reflect on it.

I think this is definitely something that most people can relate to so i thought id share my experiences.

Recently it seems like i’ve been speaking more and more about ‘outgrowing people’ and i think its safe to say that i’ve outgrown quite a few in my 23 years on this planet, particularly in the last few years.

Friendships are a funny thing. When you’re younger it’s a lot easier to meet new people and make new pals. Growing up I was incredibly outgoing and friendly and I would embrace every new person i’d meet and be open to creating a friendship. I was fortunate to have a group of great friends around me and I met my some of my best friends in secondary school.

I had a great group of friends, we had been friends since the age of 11 right through to when we all graduated university/got ‘grown up’ jobs. We were the group that stayed close despite attending different Universities and living in different cities. Often we’d bump into people who went to secondary school with us and they’d be shocked we managed to remain so close after all these years.

But…Life happens, shit happens and sometimes even the strongest of friendships deteriorate quickly. It happens to the best of us.

University was another big life lesson for me, I met people from all across the world and from different walks of life. I met some truly lovely and inspiring people, but i also met some nasty ones too. I discovered for the first time in my life that no matter how nice you can be to someone, some people are only in it for themselves and will stop at nothing to get what they want.

Luckily my house mates were ace, and considering we were complete strangers that were all plonked together in halls, we got on and clicked quickly. I was super excited when we moved into our own little house in second year. I loved cooking ‘family’ meals and snuggling up to watch films or going to the pub. I definitely considered my house mates as my extended family; but even these kinds of friendships unfortunately fizzle out. Once you graduate and move back to your different home towns, you seem to fall back into your old routines and struggle to make the time.

Something i’ve learnt lately is that friendships are pretty unpredictable and they have a way of letting us know when something isn’t ‘clicking’ anymore. Having that conversation isn’t easy, but your much better off knowing where you both stand than not at all.

I have recently drifted apart from two of my closest friends from school. It is hard when you eventually realise that the friendship no longer exists and that you’re simply holding onto it for the memories and not for present relationship. I still look through the photos we have together, and all the happy memories we’ve shared growing up with the fondest of feelings, but things happen for a reason and unfortunately there isn’t much point forcing something that has taken its course.

Whilst outgrowing people is a tough thing to accept, it’s also uplifting and can be a good thing to realise too.
Every single person that has entered my life has served a purpose in some way or another. They have been there when they needed to be, but not maybe they weren’t meant to stay for longer than that specific chapter and that’s okay. I can count my true friends on one hand and I’m completely fine with that now, maybe 5 or so years ago that would have been a little strange, but growing up has shifted that mindset entirely!

I hope you enjoyed reading this. I know it’s a bit wordy, but i wanted to share my feelings with you guys as I dont often do that on here.


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  • This sounds like it was a difficult post to write Meg and perhaps still a little raw. I haven’t been friends with my best friend since the age of 23, we had a minor disagreement and haven’t spoken again. It’s weird, I still sometimes find myself thinking back to fond memories but at the same time I have no inclination to reach out and make contact. I don’t wish her unwell and like to think if we were faced with each other now we would say hi. I feel nothing for her now, she is a stranger to me. I agree you shouldn’t have to force friendship or chase people, those meant to be in your life will be and you never know you may end up rekindling your friendship.
    Jaz xoxo

    • It was a quite hard to write but it’s got to the point in my life that I don’t want empty friendships and value quality over quantity. But yeah, maybe in the future we can rekindle our friendship because we had some great times together over the years! It’s all good Jaz! 🙂 thanks for reading, means a lot xxx

  • Ah I really enjoyed reading this Megan, it sounds like it was difficult but cathartic to write? I’m 26 now and find that whilst my group of pals is smaller than ever, I’m the happiest I’ve been in ages. I don’t think I have any close/best friends from Uni and although I too struggled with that, I value my existing friends so much more. Sometimes I worry that it was something I did but friendships often are great for one period of time and then not as your life moves. Unforced friendships are the best ones, for sure! I wrote a similar post here if you’re interested in reading! :: xx

  • I can totally resonate with this friendship post!
    I had a group of friends at school but was super close with one of them, we were literally inseparable but then as soon as we went to college, we lost touch which really, really hurt me. At college, I had a group of friends there but we all just fell out and at the time it felt like the end of the world but looking back, they clearly weren’t the right people to have in my life! Fast forward a few years and I have new friends from my uni course, work and my boyfriend. I really miss the memories but there’s no use wasting time on people that aren’t in your life anymore xx

    • So true! Thank you so much for reading Hannah. Means a lot. I’ll give your blog a read this evening with a cup of tea! Xxx